Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Take that, Steeler fan

If you hadn't seen it before now, apparently a student in Pennsylvania wore his John Elway jersey to school during the week of the AFC championship game and his butt-hole teacher who was a Steelers fan decided he was going to make an example of this poor kid. Now, the latest: I've said it before, and I'll say it again: for a Republican, John Elway is pretty freakin' cool :)

Story

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Not exactly super

Well the Broncos season came to a abrupt end tonight as they lost the AFC championship game to the Steelers. I have to say that although they have lost three other times in the playoffs since they last won the Super Bowl during the '98 season, this one hurt quite a bit more for some reason. Maybe it's because they ended up having the game at home because of the Colts losing. Maybe it's because they just flat out got their asses handed to them by Pittsburg. Or maybe it's just because I could have sworn this was going to be their year. All the breaks seemed to be going their way pretty much the whole season, and even when they didn't I was still confident all would work out in the end. Following a tradition that I started 10 years ago when they lost in the playoffs at home to Jacksonville, as soon as the game was over I turned off the TV - no way I was going to sit there and watch the Steelers accept the AFC trophy on our home field - and headed straight to work to blow off some steam. The idea is to take my mind off what I just saw and in the process get a jump on the week. I'm currently wiping out a Advertising G5 and writing this while it zero's out. Anyway, yes it sucks, but as I said to a few people this week (perhaps anticipating this result somehow) it is different when your team has won the Super Bowl, even if it has been a while since it happened. I don't think I'll be still feeling this loss a week from now, as I used to when they lost their Super Bowls in the 80's. It was a great season, they should be bringing most everyone back for another run next year, and hey - any season when they beat the Raiders twice is a success as far as I'm concerned! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to finish up here at work, then go home and pop in my Super Bowl 32 DVD. Yes, I still lose it when Elway hoists the trophy and I don't care what you think about that.

Friday, January 20, 2006

I'm rich!

I recieved this letter today....I have to say, I admire the personal touch here. Not like the other ones I get that always start out with "Dear Bonner"......

My Dear,

I am happy to inform you about my success in getting the inheritance fund transfered under the cooperation of a new partner from Asia. Presently I am in Asia for investment projects with my own share of the total sum. Meanwhile, I did not forget your past efforts and attempts to assist me in transfering those funds despite that it failed us some how but at least God has answered my prayers at the end.

Now contact my secretary in BENIN, her name is MRS JILL VASENA her email; mrsjillvasena@o2.pl and ask her to send you the total sum of $500.000 USD (FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND US DOLLARS) certified bank draft which I raised in your favour for your compensation for all the past efforts and attempts to assist me in this transaction.

I appreciated your efforts at that time very much so feel free and get in touch with my secretary and give her your address where to send the draft to you. Please do let me know immediately you receive it so that we can share the joy after all the suffering at that time.

I am very busy at the moment here in Asia because of the investment projects which I and the new partner are having at hand. Finally remember that I had forwarded an instruction to my secretary on your behalf to make sure that you receive that money, so feel free to contact her without any delay so you can receive your compensation.

Best regards and God Bless.

PRESSLING VALENTINE

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

That's it???!!!

On Average, You Would Sell Out For

$1,052,275

Now, I have to be honest here - I said yes to four of these questions. Which four? Well, if you know me at all you can probably guess ;0)

Monday, January 16, 2006

One down, two to go

My response to this melvin, and all the Bronco haters in general who are whining about the Broncos victory over the New England Patriots this past weekend.....

Dear Mr. Wojciechowski,

In the time that I have been a Bronco fan (since 1985 when I was seven years old), I have had my share of arguments with the Chief fan boys and Raider ex-convicts. I will tell you that John Elway was the greatest QB of all time, if for no other reason than he single-handedly took the Broncos to those three Super Bowls in the 80's - they had no one else on any of those teams. Montana had the running game, the receivers, the defense. Elway? Just his right arm - enough to get there, but not enough to beat the best team in the NFC. I will argue that Terrell Davis most certainly does belong in the Hall of Fame. If you're going to let Gale Sayers in you better let T.D. in as well. I will even tell you that despite winning two Super Bowls with the new ones, I much prefer the old orange jerseys.

However, I can't recall a time that I ever responded to a journalist (well, I may have called Woody Paige every name in the book after he needlessly mocked the Jaguars before the '96 playoff loss) who wrote something about the Broncos I didn't like. Until now. Your article on the Broncos being fortunate to beat the Pats last Saturday night was, in my opinion, incorrect. The gist of your argument was that had the Pats not turned the ball over 5 times, they would have won the game. The basis of this argument is flawed - Shannahan called plays based on the conditions of the game. If Denver is ahead or behind, that will dictate the type of offense that is being executed. Beyond that however, is the simple fact that the Pats DID turn the ball over 5 times. They weren't a great football team. They weren't all year. They made enough mistakes to go 10-6 on the year, and they made enough mistakes to lose on Saturday night. The Broncos, on the other hand, went 13-3. They only had one turnover in the game. They were the better team because the better team DOESN'T MAKE MISTAKES!!! If we were to take your argument as fact, then we invalidate every winning team who has won the turnover battle in that game. Was New England "fortunate" to win their Super Bowls when they got more turnovers than the other team?

I also take umbrage with your accretion that the Colts would have won by two touchdowns had they played. You, along with seemingly every other "expert" would think this for the same reason you all picked New England to win Saturday night - history. Oh the Colts beat the crap out of Denver the last two years. Oh the Patriots are a great dynasty so they will win easily in Denver. What these same experts don't seem to realize is that history plays little part in an NFL game. Only when the teams have previously played each other that year is it at all relevant, and even then not all that much. Had you been paying any attention at all to Denver this year, you would have known that we Bronco fans WANTED to play the Colts, because our pressure defense would have done exactly what Pittsburg did to Indy yesterday.

This upcoming AFC championship game proves that things in the NFL have a way of working themselves out. Take out the injury to Roethlisberger during the middle of the season, and you are left with the two most consistent teams in the conference all year. It will be a knock-down-drag-out fight, and yes Mr. Wojciechowski, the team that makes the fewest mistakes will win - and they will be the better team.

Sincerely,
Morgan Bonner

Thursday, January 12, 2006

From Russia with love

Today I was all excited to go to iTunes so I can check out the soundtrack to the new Underworld movie. I liked the music from the first one, so I was hopeful that I'd find something that I'd like. Well, I did - one song by Puscifer (whom, as far as I can tell, have only made two songs, and only for the Underworld soundtracks). Sadly, the songs aren't for sale individually. This seems to be happening with more and more albums these days. Obviously the record industry, whom we know for a fact hates their customers, is doing it's best to end the pay-per-song model that Apple has been using. This irritates me greatly. I want that song, but I don't want to pay $10 for it. Should I just give up and let the music companies screw me yet again, charging me $18 for something that costs them $2 to make? Or maybe I'll go pay a visit to my friends in Moscow - who thanks to the very enlightened Russian copyright laws, charge about 5 cents a song. I gave the Russian mafia ERRRR I mean the Russian music people money a while ago, when I was looking for a specific album that was only released in England. They charge you $20 upfront, and then deduct from your account with each song that you buy. I went through the entire catalog, bought more music in one week than I had in the previous year, and still had $11.30 left over. Took me forever to spend the rest of that money. I finally did, and then went back to iTunes. See, I don't mind paying $1 a song. That's what the music industry doesn't seem to get. I will pay them that - I won't pay them $2.50 for a song. Or $10 for an album full of songs I don't want just to get one that I do, like I did countless times before the days of the MP3 (aka, the dark times). And I sure as hell won't be paying them whatever they are charging for CD's these days. So if I can't buy a song that I want for $1, what does that leave me?

Dasvidana comrades.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Take your pills!!!

Ok, so if there's even a chance that Vitamin D reduces your risk of getting cancer, everybody go start taking your multi-vitaims right now. I want you all to still be reading this blog when you turn 90....good grief that's a scary thought.

Story

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Happy New Year!

Well it's 2006 - thank goodness. We spent New Year's Eve at Robyn's house and then rang in the new year at some bar in downtown Beaufort where the music was so loud that I, in fact, could not hear myself think, and I actually had a glass (well ok, a few sips) of champagne. This was due to me getting completely hammered earlier in the night with my good friend and namesake, Captain Morgan. Just kidding Mom - I posed with him just to freak you out. Anyway, this was a vast departure from my normal superstitious behavior on new year's, which started 11 years ago. I don't even remember why I didn't stay up new year's eve, 1994 - but I didn't and I had a pretty decent 1995. And thus, the tradition was born. While the rest of the world is celebrating and setting off fireworks, I was always tucked snugly in my bed. This tradition had continued up until last night, as I figured that it was time for a change. So, we'll see - I either just felt which way the wind was blowing, and adjusted accordingly....or I just completely screwed myself and am going to have an awful year. It will be interesting to see what I'm posting to this blog on January 1st, 2007....

A decent season

The Broncos finished the regular season with a win against the Chargers, and a final record of 13-3. Of those three losses, only one of which was deserved. Friggin' Chiefs....anyway, I have to say that there has just been a certain way the ball has been bouncing this year. I've really only seen the ball bounce that way two other times before during a season, and they just happened to win the Super Bowl those years. Anyway, I'm looking forward to the playoffs - which start for Denver either January 14th or 15th. I don't care who they play, but ultimately I would like for them to play the Colts in the AFC Championship game. The Colts have ended Denver's season the last two years, and I think a little payback is in order. I am developing an active dislike for that squad....I don't wish a thousand years of pain and suffering on them like I do Oakland and KC, but they have a stranglehold on the coveted "team that Morgan hates the third-most" title.

Also, can I just say that the Bronco cheerleaders (along with my wife :) are by far the most beautiful women in the world. The Raider cheerleaders on the other hand, are just hideous. I mean, look at them. Ewww.